First Boyfriend (Part Four)

In the dim light of Ai's hospital room, Koji lingered in the shadows, watching as her mother busily tended to her every need. The moments following Ai’s tumble down the jinja’s steps had become a hazy memory for him; he couldn’t even recall the moment he reached out to her mother to share the news of Ai’s accident. He trailed the ambulance in his car, the journey a blur, until he found himself standing in Ai’s room, where she lay with her head wrapped in bandages. As she stirred from her slumber and graced him with a smile, it was as if he was drawn back into the vibrant tapestry of existence.

Now, as her mother unpacked her belongings and placed them into the cabinet drawers next to her hospital bed, Ai would occasionally glance at him and smile sweetly. Comfortable pajamas, essential toiletries, and a selection of magazines for her enjoyment. Koji stood still, a silent observer, not daring to stir. A wave of guilt washed over him as Ai's mother completely ignored him, her silence heavy with unspoken accusations, as if he were the cause of her daughter's plight.

After a moment, she leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss on her daughter's forehead, whispering softly for her to get some rest. She promised to return the following day for a visit. With a gentle smile, Ai complied without hesitation. As Ai's mother stepped out of the room, she cast a fierce glance at Koji, her eyes urging him to join her in the hallway. Koji, with a quiet resolve, adhered to her command and stepped out alongside her. In silence, they walked the length of the hall. Once she felt confident they had moved far enough from Ai's room, ensuring her words would remain unheard, she turned to Koji and began to scold him.

"I had faith that you would protect Ai while she was in your care," she started. Koji's eyes grew wide, and his lips parted ever so slightly, yet silence overtook him, leaving him unable to utter a single word in reply.

Ai's mother went on, "She has never had a boyfriend; you are her very first." Having just crossed the threshold into adulthood, I felt it was time to grant her the freedom to explore connections with someone special. From the very beginning, I have stood by her side. I have always been there for her, shielding her from harm." "How could you view that responsibility with such disregard?" she demanded. Koji remained silent, soaking up her words as they rained down upon him, a storm of criticism that he chose not to counter.

Once more, a sense of disappointment washed over him,  he had failed to protect yet another person. First, there was the old man in the senior facility, and now Ai. Koji lowered his gaze to the ground, letting Ai's mother unleash her words upon him without interruption. "She holds a special place in my heart. She is the most precious thing in my life," her mother continued.

At that moment, a flicker of movement caught his attention, drawing his gaze to a shadowy figure lingering in the doorway to his right. Koji shifted his eyes, seeking a clearer view. He could see him distinctly now; it was an old man. The same elderly figure who lingered at the top of the stairs at the jinja, where Ai stumbled and hurt herself. Koji's look deepened, fixated on the figure that stood quietly in the doorway, observing him with an unwavering presence. In that moment of realization, he understood that it was the same man who had sent the distress signal from the senior apartments. The man who died because Koji arrived too late to help him.

What brought him to that place? What could have compelled him to follow Koji? Could he be a restless soul, driven by a thirst for retribution? Was he upset that Koji could not get to him in time to assist him and for that reason he would do everything in his power to hurt Koji? Was it he who led Ai to tumble down the stairs? Did he bring about the moment when Ai's mother turned against him? In a whirlwind of chaos, Koji found himself engulfed in panic, his thoughts darting like fireflies in the night. He had become deaf to the biting words that flowed from Ai's mother.

Mid-sentence, Koji interrupted Ai's mother and excused himself. He mentioned that he needed to go to work. Quickly, he hurried to the office, beads of sweat shimmering on his forehead and his heart racing wildly in his chest. There he was, his senpai Hiroshi, seated at his desk just like every other day. Hiroshi, taken aback by Koji's unexpected appearance, sprang to his feet and hurried over to his side. "Are you alright?" he inquired. "No," Koji replied, "can we talk?" he asked. "Of course, of course," Hiroshi replied. "Not here," Koji urged, "let's go upstairs."

As the two men ascended the staircase, they headed toward the rooftop sanctuary of the building, a place where their secrets would remain undisturbed. Perched on the ledge, Koji wove his tale while Hiroshi absorbed every word with rapt attention. Hiroshi sat in quiet contemplation, absorbing the weight of Koji's tale after it had come to an end. From his shirt pocket, he retrieved a pack of cigarettes and extended an invitation to Koji for a smoke. Koji dismissed the offer with a wave, while Hiroshi retrieved a cigarette, lit it, and inhaled deeply, savoring the moment.

"Do you believe the spirit of the old man is filled with wrath because you didn't arrive to help him when it mattered?" Hiroshi asked. "Yes," Koji affirmed, "He has manifested on two occasions when the stakes were high. It seems he wishes to convey his anger to me.” "In that case, an apology to him is in order," Hiroshi proposed. "Apologize?" Koji inquired. "Yes, if you go to his apartment and offer a sincere apology, his spirit will find peace, and he will no longer seek to harm you." Koji hesitated, questioning the wisdom of his senpai's advice, yet he resolved to give it a chance regardless.

The following day, Koji makes his way to the senior center, stepping into the elevator that will carry him to the fourth floor. As the elevator doors glide apart, he emerges with a deliberate pace, making his way down the lengthy corridor towards apartment 49. He observes that during the day, it appears friendlier and more cheerful. With a practiced motion, he retrieves the spare key from his pocket and slides it into the lock. With a quick twist, the lock gives way. With a gentle turn of the door knob, Koji steps into the apartment. As he strolls down the hallway, now aglow with the sunlight streaming through the large kitchen window, an unsettling silence envelops the space. He observes that the man's possessions have been carefully packed away in boxes. In the living room, the television remains perched upon its stand, a silent reminder of the man's everyday life. Koji notices that a framed photograph of the old man has been carefully positioned in front of it.

Koji kneels before the photo, his gaze fixed on the old man's image, those kind eyes seeming to reach out to him from the past. He digs into one of the plastic bags he brought along and retrieves a vibrant bouquet of flowers. With a gentle motion, he retrieves a small plastic vase, making his way to the kitchen sink to fill it with water. As Koji steps back to his familiar spot before the picture frame, he delicately peels away the plastic wrap protecting the flowers, taking his time to arrange each bloom with care in the vase. He sets the flowers beside the photo frame. He takes out a small box of incense from the other plastic bag. He opens the box and takes out a stick of incense and a ceramic incense holder. He carefully sets them on the opposite side of the photo frame. He extracts a lighter from his shirt pocket. After lighting the incense, he sets it inside the holder. Then he takes out a small sake bottle and sets it in front of the photo frame. As he gazes at the photo once more, he observes that the old man's lips are gently curved into the faintest hint of a smile. Why had it escaped his notice until now, he wonders? Is his imagination deceiving him?

Koji puts his hands together, bows his head, and offers a brief prayer. At last, his lips part to whisper, "I am sorry, please forgive me." He casts his eyes upon the photograph once more. A soft serenity now permeates the air inside the apartment. He carefully collects the bags and wrappings before leaving the apartment, locking the door with a decisive click behind him.

As he strides toward the elevator, the sound of his phone ringing breaks the silence. It is Ai. She is calling from the hospital, her voice trembles with a haunting urgency, echoing the depths of her despair. Koji's thoughts swirl like a tempest. Has something happened to Ai? Could it be the wrathful spirit of the old man once more? Did the prayers and offerings fall short of their purpose?

(To be continued…)